It’s true
The moment he laid eyes on you he knew
The only wish he wanted came true
He knows he’s lucky that he met someone like you
I don’t understand how love can be so fleeting.
What is love, exactly?
How can someone proclaim he’s so deeply and insanely in love with you one moment, and that he’ll never choose anyone but you–
and the next moment forget you and date someone else.
What does it mean to love, I don’t understand how you can promise so many things-
I don’t work like that.
How can someone be significant in your life, and you create an entire fantasy around it, when the next moment you become but a faded memory of their past? (And perhaps not of their past, you just fade into nothing)
And how can you feel something akin to love to someone, and hear that they love you ten times, a hundred times more- and be hurt by them the next moment. They, who made promises, who swore to love you no matter what?
Love. I hate that word sometimes.
I yearn for it, yet I don’t. I feel it, yet I can’t give it, not really. Not entirely, not yet.
Even the loss of what was a shadow of love leaves you crying and screaming in the middle of the night, sobbing through series of a teen drama and feeling as though your heart was torn out of your chest.
It hurt, it physically hurt.
Now, I can’t remember how I felt towards him. Perhaps it is because I try hard to forget, or subconsciously erase the memory of him. But he’s still there, the songs he sang to me are still his, the songs I listened to when I fell for him still remind me of him. My heart beats harder when it hears those songs, sometimes due to happiness, the giddy feeling of falling in love- sometimes due to loss, the pain and suffering of love lost.
I don’t know whether I should cherish it or fling it into nothingness. Because I can.
Was that really love?
But the feelings are gone. The only thing I have now are memories.
I have a good thing right now. And I shall keep it, God willing.
God, my first love. God, the truest love known to Man, known to me. God, guide me through this and bless me- be with me, help me, strengthen me.
Let me be your faithful servant, and let me be a beautiful, smart, slender, faithful girl who you are proud of.
I love you Lord. And that, I can never lose.
If you can just stop loving her then you never really loved her at all. Love doesn’t work that way. If you ever truly love someone, then it never goes away. It can become something else. There are all different sorts of love. It can even become hate—a thin line and all that—and, really, hate is just another kind of caring.
Blakney Francis, Someone I Used to Know (via perfect)
That’s it.
I’ll always choose you.” “Every single lifetime, I’ll choose you. Just as you have always chosen me. Forever.
To the boy that called me at midnight every year on my birthday, I’m sorry that things ended this way. I miss you, I miss the boy that’s always been there for me (through my nonsense, through my freakouts, through my fangirling) I wish that I could have been in love with you too, but I’m in love with him now and it’s not possible, its not possible, not at all.
Please don’t be angry at me. It hurts me that this friendship is over and the summer set reminds me of you and how much fun we had together. I… don’t want things to end this way but … I can’t do anything now, can I?
Please keep my secrets. Don’t hurt me with them, please.
I shared my heart with you, I just couldn’t be in love with you, hard as I tried.
I try not to think about you. But songs remind me of you. I don’t love you, I just remember you fondly.
It was never going to work. I tried to make it work, but there was something.
It wasn’t a question after that, it was her. it always was her and I would be with her, no matter what, no matter the consequences. Unthinking, I rode past Lilia and placed the silver rose on Lucea’s lap. Her eyes lifted to mine, and it felt like time had frozen. She was meant to be with me, not him. Not him. He claimed to love her, but not like I would. No one would love her like I would. It wasn’t going to work. ‘That’s the future queen!’ Robert roared. I laughed quietly to myself for she could never be his.
I love you now more desperately, this moment, than I have ever loved you before, and in an hour I will love you more than that. It is unfair to tell you this, I know, when you can do nothing about it.
Do you know the feeling after you’ve finished reading the last line of the epilogue of Clockwork Princess, and that you still turn the page hoping there’s more, that it is not yet the end? The tears streaming down your face, the feeling that no one will ever love you as much as Will loved Tessa…
Don’t feel bad if you still wish your body looked different or if your voice sounded better or if you can’t quite love yourself yet. Self-acceptance is a journey. You’re not hopeless just because others may be ahead of you. Appreciate yourself. Appreciate how far you’ve come. You’re on your way, at your own pace.
